on the eve

Tomorrow morning I will go for the baseline sono and e2 b/w and start lupron. I have to admit as excited as I am to get this going I am also nervous! What if this doesn't work, what if we should have just kept trying with out help a little longer, what if the meds make me crazy, what if I have a break down, what if my husband has a break down, what if I do get pregnant to only have a m/c, and the list goes on. I know logically in my head that we can not conceive on our own, I rarely O and DH has very few good sperm so the chances of the two meeting are little to none. But I been thinking, since late Aug. we haven't been "trying" per say b/c I went through a clomid cycle where I never Oed and then I went on bcp for ivf. What if one of the past few months I would have Oed on my own and maybe one of DH sperm could have found it. maybe.

and when did I start referring to Oing is in ovulating and not as in Orgasm? Oh, that's right, when I figured out I don't ovulate.

To remain on the positive side we have made a day of it tomorrow. Since we have to get up early, as the RE's office is only open from 8-8:30, we are going to breakfast right after and then to a museum, then we are going to watch the afternoon football games. and sometime in there I will take the plunge and give myself the 1st injection! Though I secretively want to take it to the RE's office and let them do it for me:)